The Evils

Why won't you love me like a son, Dad?

Cuz you're not Eeevil enuff, Scott

You're Semi-Eeevil

You're Quasi-Eeevil

You're the Cocoa Butter Substitute of Eeevil.

From The Mailbin : The Shepherd and The IT Guy

This one is from the mailbin.

Once upon a time there was a shepherd looking after his sheep on the 
side of a deserted road. Suddenly a brand new Porsche screeches to a 
halt. 
The driver, a man dressed in an Armani suit, Cerutti shoes, Ray-Ban 
sunglasses, TAG-Heuer wrist-watch, and a Pierre Cardin tie, gets out and 
asks the Shepherd: "If I can tell you how many sheep you have, will you 
give me one of them?" 
The shepherd looks at the young man, and then looks at the large flock 
of grazing sheep and replies: "Okay." The young man parks the car, 
connects his laptop to the mobile-fax, enters a NASA Webster, scans the 
ground using his GPS, opens a database and 60 Excel tables filled with 
logarithms and pivot tables, then prints out a 150 page report on his 
high-tech mini-printer. He turns to the shepherd and says, "You have 
exactly 1,586 sheep here." The shepherd cheers," That's correct, you can have 
your sheep." 


The young man makes his pick and puts it in the back of his Porsche. 
The shepherd looks at him and asks: "If I guess your profession, will you 
return my animal to me?" 
  
The young man answers, "Yes, why not?" The shepherd says, "You are an 
IT consultant. "How did you know?" asks the young man. "Very simple," 
answers the shepherd. "First, you came here without being called. Second, 
you charged me a fee to tell me something I already knew, and third, 
you don't understand anything about my business... 

Now can I have my DOG back?